Tag: What I Want

2023.

New year, new goals? Not really me this year. I want to continue to work on things from 2022 and finish them in 2023 if it’s possible. I want to pick up what I left behind and make them even better and make them for me and only me. New year, same thing, more healing and growth.

2023, I hope you are kinder than 2022. I hope you are filled with more love and laughs. Whether it’s intimate love or platonic love, just more of it please. More love for me. I hope the tears cried from last year watered something special and not just my pillows. If I absolutely have to cry this year, I hope it’s all tears of joy. I hope to grow more from last years things, situations, lessons and people. I want to grow. I hope to find my peace, the real peace. I hope to eventually be at peace. I hope you are filled with time that is just for me. I hope I get time for myself to enjoy and slow down my life. I hope you’re filled with more time in general. Time, I need time, I want time. Maybe if you could also be a little easier with me. I’ve gotten fragile. I would love if you could help me heal instead of showing me what I need to heal from, I think I pretty much got the point or the message. I hope you are filled with travels, with adventure and great captured memories. I hope all the bad days will help me shine just as bright as my good ones. I’ll do the work this year, I’ll do all of it.

We’re starting 2023 a little late over here at SALLY♡THINGS, but here’s an update. 2023, it’s already been a busy one with both good and bad. It’s has to start somewhere right? The new year started with love. Remember more love. With that love, it came with time and with the time it came with healing. I am starting out strong even though it doesn’t feel like it. I’m still here.
2023 is the year to focus more on myself and be selfish with it and to finally take advantage of that. I’ve accepted a second job that is different from what I’m use too, but something that will give me experience in something that I have been getting more and more passionate about. I am truly excited for that and what it’ll bring. I’ve come a long way and I’m willing to go much further.

What I Want From 2021.

I’m not going to sit up here and say “new year, new me” because honestly I like who I am and how I am, but there are a couple adjustments that I feel would be better for me. I already found myself a while ago, but it’s hard trying to be that same person without falling in or getting sucked back into old toxic ways. I can tell you that it’s been a real struggle for the past year and a half.

I can agree that I fell back into old ways. I’ve felt like I had to prove myself to others when I really didn’t have too. I felt like I had to save myself when my name was getting dragged in the dirt, when my intentions and actions were made out of love. I let that whole thing eat me alive and I really let it get to me.
I’m gonna talk my shit now, but I really let a person who couldn’t speak or message me without hiding behind multiple fake accounts have so much of my energy. How stupid was I to let that happen continuously? You want to know the worst part of it all? I felt sympathy for this person because I know it all came from hurt, but I was too hurt and mad myself to go about things another way and I got sucked right into the toxic part of it. Before anyone gets ideas and decides to anonymously message me saying that this person wasn’t the only one to create the problem, I know that. I’m not blaming just one side, I’ve been fully aware, this side just happened to be the one that became public. I can also admit and take full responsibility that I fueled a fire and kept it going. What I won’t say is sorry though, I defended my own ass in any way that it felt necessary because a lot of people let all that shit slide and did absolutely nothing, but watch. They wanted the show and we gave that to them.

Now what I want from 2021 is to heal and find my peace with everything I just mentioned and everything else surrounding it. I want to move on and fully forgive myself, my person and all the others. I don’t want to carry this hate and sadness around anymore, that’s just not who I am. What I want from this year is to be able to let go and move on. I don’t want to feel like I have to watch my own back 24/7 whenever I’m in public. I want to be able to meet new people without having to feel like I have to be cautious and question if their intentions are actually genuine or not. Everything that I can do and feel over here is what I want it to be like again there. If you are reading this with ill will, I’m okay with us being complete strangers to each other. I understand that not everyone is for each other and really that’s okay. We can make it mutually known and I won’t ever bother you. I’d rather have that than someone faking to like me because I’m dating this person or cause I hang out with these people. I am not defined by some other person. I can respect the honesty of it.

I know what I want and hope for will take some time and it might not even be this year, but any step closer is good enough for me.
Because I’m going to read this plenty of times through out the year, a reminder, YOU chose to pick love when it was the last thing you felt and YOU did nothing wrong by that. Vivi con amore.
I talked my shit and now I’m leaving it here.

SALLY ♡ T